How To Be Delulu

I briefly mentioned that I've been exploring a different modality every week. "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." You caught me! I don't actually know the definition of modality. But it's a fancy word, so I just keep saying it. I think it means an alternative healing method or technique? Regardless, the "modality" we're going to discover today is called "thought work."

Originated by Brooke Castillo, and The Life Coach School, (and inspired by what Byron Katie called "the work" in her 2003 book,"Loving What Is,") many coaches will charge you an arm and a leg for "the self coaching model," but luckily for you, my coach gives away tons of free content on her podcast! The model is based around the idea that all circumstances are neutral; but it's our thoughts about said circumstances that creates our feelings, which determines our actions, which creates the results we're seeing in our life. In short- if you don't like your life, or the way you feel about your life; change your thoughts about it. You have control over them.

Glimmers!

Y'all have heard of this concept of "glimmers," right? Honestly, it's kind-of new to me. (Have I been living under a rock?) Apparently, they've been around since 2018, (well, they've always been around, but the term was coined then, and the concept widely adopted.) They're the opposite of triggers. They're small moments that spark joy, which can help cue our nervous system to feel safe or calm. Experts say this mindset shift can make a positive impact on our mental health. The whole point of them is that they're tiny, micro moments of peace, instead of large, delight-filled productions. Because sometimes finding your bliss can be daunting. There are days when it's hard to be happy.

But if you train your brain to notice the mini moments; the beauty of the stars on a clear night, the position of your head as you bite into a taco, the way your kids have started to chase bunnies out of the garden beds to please your husband, the moment when you can't turn the car off until that awesome song finishes playing... (You catch my drift.) Once you start to notice them, it begets even more noticing... And if you really want to challenge yourself, you can try to make a point of not just noticing them, but remembering them throughout the day to record in a journal when you get home, and watch as your progress grows. Watch as your happiness, your observation skills, and your ability to slow down and smell the roses, grows.

Emotional Clearing Method

The term "emotional clearing" is fairly general, and I could be talking about any number of wonderful techniques to clear your emotions. Journaling, meditating, visualization, breath work, somatic therapy, etc. But when I talk about DOING emotional clearing, I'm specifically referring to what Dana Evans is teaching- which is the Emotional Clearing Method, aka ECM.

ECM is a combination of some of the above-mentioned practices, and focuses on creating a safe space for individuals to reconnect with their inner world, fostering deep emotional healing. (Dana literally describes getting comfortable and creating a "nest" to relax into. So it's a little different from traditional meditation, which sometimes utilizes rigid postures to keep you focused on your third eye or whatever.) It's described as a therapeutic approach that integrates mindfulness, somatic awareness, and energy work to resolve unresolved emotions. I would describe the actual process as a mixture of body scan meditation and guided visualization (if you can picture that- or perhaps that all sounded like a bunch of mumbo jumbo.) Maybe this explanation will help:

Bodhisattva

I may have mentioned that this month I was focusing on Buddhism, because (of all the religions) it interested me the most. I may also have mentioned that (per my project requirements, which I had set upon myself.) I was also required to read one book per religion each month.

Well, being my first month and all, I wanted to start small. (With a children's book I could buy at Target for 30% off, apparently.) "Big Panda and Tiny Dragon" by James Norbury (he has other books that I presume are equally as charming.) This book is a delight, and I highly recommend it! I recall reading "The Tao of Pooh," in high school, and would say this is comparable, except perhaps even easier, and more cute. It's the tale of two friends, following a winding path through the seasons of a year together. Their road often goes nowhere, they get lost a bunch, and they drink a lot of tea- but that's kind-of the point of Buddhism, isn't it? To never become so focused on the end result that you lose sight of the journey. To always be present in the moment (hence why meditation is such an important part of the practice.)

Let There Be Light!

To bring you up to speed to where I currently am religiously, I consider myself Jewish. When I met my husband, he was Jewish. I was not Jewish then. Also, we both were/are Atheists. I had dated an Orthodox Jew (now THAT’S a wild tale for another post- mostly because he was also a cage fighter into MMA) towards the end of college, so it wasn’t anything unfamiliar. (Is it bad to admit that I’m actually leery of dating Christians?) I’m not trying to be religionist, if that's a thing you can be while dating. But I'm not sure if it is? Inclusion is necessary, but when you’re sussing out who you’re going to marry, you want to be sure you’re on the same page, in all of the ways. I think for me, it’s more about what Christianity has come to represent in America; it’s become this hateful, political, evangelical thing. And if I see a reference to Jesus Christ on your dating profile- it’s NEXT! (But that’s for another blog post, and maybe I’ll be proven wrong throughout the course of this project!)

In The Beginning...

So just to re-cap; there's now a new-and-improved pink project 2.0. I decided since Ivy and I were besties already, and since the spirituality section of my “wheel of my life,” had gotten the lowest score, (3/10), it obviously needed the most attention. And so it was time to go on a journey to discover (re-discover?) my spirituality.

I say “re-discover,” because I wasn’t always this creature devoid of all beliefs who stands before you now. (Well, to be honest, I kinda was.) Cuz I definitely took on the role of whistleblower as a precocious elementary school kid, sitting in the corner of my Sunday School (CCD) class, watching my teacher with narrowed, suspicious eyes. Whenever my hand started to slowly raise from the corner, you could practically hear the teacher’s eyes start to roll backwards.

“What is it THIS TIME, Colleen?”

“I’ve got some issues with the concept of hell. You said God is omnipotent, so He knows everything that’s going to happen in advance, right? So He already knows if I’m going to end up in heaven or hell. Well, if He loves his children SO MUCH, then why would He even create those of us who He knows are going to end up burning in hell? Why even create Lucifer, if He already knew how the story would end?”

The Pink Project 2.0

 Let me bring us back to the topic at hand- (I got a little off track in my last post with my "state-of-the-fine-arts-in-colleges address.") So here we are- currently trying to nail down exactly what my BBL project is. 

“It sounds like you’ve already finished your Pink Project, so now what?”

Welp, that was a shocking statement. But it HAD been an astonishing emotional clearing session with the fabulous Dana Evans. (What is emotional clearing? That sounds like a great topic for another blog entry!) I had channeled Ivy, and I mean, I HAD CHANNELED IVY. It was similar to Whoopi Goldberg channeling Demi Moore in that famous scene from Ghost. (That scene is kind-of gross if you think about it. Patrick Swayze was actually getting hot and heavy with Whoopi’s gnarly red manicured fingers that whole time.) Now that I’ve given away my age with a “Ghost” reference (any other Xennials in the house!?) Let me bring you back to my conversation with Ivy.

Living Your Lottery Life

I'm in this high-end coaching program called the Bigger & Better Life Mastermind. BBL for short, but NOT Brazilian Butt Lift, lol (even though I desperately need one after dropping forty pounds in record time.) It's ten amazing women, and we've all come up with projects to do over the course of the next six months to rocket our lottery lives forward into the stratosphere of greatness. (What if every day could feel like you've won the lottery?) Unsurprisingly, it's with my life coach, Dorothy, and culminates in a retreat in Pensacola.

The Rose Quartz Challenge

Whoops! I realize I’m somewhat missing the “pink” component of my pink project. While I’ve been doing a good job of conversing and advancing my relationship with Ivy, I’ve completely forgotten to ask her- “does this feel pink?”

According to “the googles,” the color pink represents- femininity, sensitivity, tenderness, sweetness, softness, romance, innocence, playfulness, healing, charm, and calming. All good stuff that I’d love to cultivate more of in my life. Rose quartz is a healing crystal- known as a stone of “unconditional love.” It’s healing properties include- promoting mutual understanding, inspiring compassion, healing relationship problems, and emitting vibrations of love and joy. I think I have one of those stones around here somewhere. I should find it, cleanse it (leave it out in the sunshine or moonshine,) and then carry it around for a week and see how that goes for me. Another fun experiment to try.

Human Design 101

What is Human Design? Simply put, it’s a fun tool for self-discovery and growth. (Which is what this entire journey is about, right?) To get research-y about it; it’s a system (that was developed in 1987, so why am I just hearing about it now!?) that combines elements of several different disciplines; including astrology, the I Ching, the Kabbalah, the Chakra system, and quantum physics. So if you want to get “woo” with me, and see if the concept of Human Design can help you navigate your life more effectively, click here and see what your human design type is!

I’m a 1/4 (the omniscient teacher) Manifesting Generator. I have a sacral authority (which we’ve discussed a million times already, because that means I make decisions from the gut (from Ivy) rather than emotionally, or by waiting, or by talking it through with other people. (Now I’m just going to throw a bunch of terminology at you.)