Welcome to the Gay Parade

Once upon a time, I was on a girls trip in LA, with my friend, Kathleen. We were hanging out with her cousin, an actor, (cuz obviously,) and I told him this story; and he was adamant that we turn it into a romcom. It must've been a lot funnier in the telling, because it just seems sad written down here. But he assured me that in Hollywood- all it takes is one great, original idea! So, as promised, it's the post explaining my dry spell during college. Here's the parade of gay guys I "dated," (or just crushed upon) and the tragic tale of how they destroyed my self-esteem bit by bit (ouch.) However- if this screenplay DOES ever get made- I want to state for the record that I choose Awkwafina to play me.

In The Beginning...

So just to re-cap; there's now a new-and-improved pink project 2.0. I decided since Ivy and I were besties already, and since the spirituality section of my “wheel of my life,” had gotten the lowest score, (3/10), it obviously needed the most attention. And so it was time to go on a journey to discover (re-discover?) my spirituality.

I say “re-discover,” because I wasn’t always this creature devoid of all beliefs who stands before you now. (Well, to be honest, I kinda was.) Cuz I definitely took on the role of whistleblower as a precocious elementary school kid, sitting in the corner of my Sunday School (CCD) class, watching my teacher with narrowed, suspicious eyes. Whenever my hand started to slowly raise from the corner, you could practically hear the teacher’s eyes start to roll backwards.

“What is it THIS TIME, Colleen?”

“I’ve got some issues with the concept of hell. You said God is omnipotent, so He knows everything that’s going to happen in advance, right? So He already knows if I’m going to end up in heaven or hell. Well, if He loves his children SO MUCH, then why would He even create those of us who He knows are going to end up burning in hell? Why even create Lucifer, if He already knew how the story would end?”

Living Your Lottery Life

I'm in this high-end coaching program called the Bigger & Better Life Mastermind. BBL for short, but NOT Brazilian Butt Lift, lol (even though I desperately need one after dropping forty pounds in record time.) It's ten amazing women, and we've all come up with projects to do over the course of the next six months to rocket our lottery lives forward into the stratosphere of greatness. (What if every day could feel like you've won the lottery?) Unsurprisingly, it's with my life coach, Dorothy, and culminates in a retreat in Pensacola.